Should I take Ballet away?

So my girls are 5 and 7. The last three months we have been dealing with sassy talking towards me. Telling me No. Fighting with each other. Not cleaning up messes. Things that I thought we had mastered and overcome years ago. I tried time outs. I tried spankings. And it doesn't seem like it is working. I have talked to them and explained how they were behaving and what I expect. and I am just tired of always fighting. I have now threatened that I am going to take away their Ballet lessons which start tomorrow until January. If they have changed and are behaving better by then I said we would consider putting them back in? Is this to tough for their age? They don't watch a ton of tv or movies so I can't take that away and since they are so young they don't go anywhere by themselves...URG!! I just don't want to be unreasonable... Any thoughts? Any ideas that have worked for anyone in the past?

Should I take Ballet away?performing arts center

Don't take away the ballet- with it they will learn discipline and maybe even a better way to focus that anger...

find ways around it- tell them they must go to their room for a half hour. That sticks them in silence- and it becomes something they hate- so they will try to avoid it happening... once ballet starts- if they start getting out of han- make them practice...

Also they are both of ages where they really begin to think...so when they go to their room- give them mission...maybe tell your five year old that with her time that she's in her room she must come up with a story with her stuff animals- that takes away her anger towards you and focuses her attention on something else- it's good for them to have an imagination- and helps them when they get upset to focus on something like story telling

tell the 7 year old that she has to read a book and then tell you about it...or creat a story of her own

If children learn a way to focus their anger- it will help them not to have problems with their teachers or with other children when they are learning to be more socialable..

ballet is another thing- if they get upset or angry- take ut the anger in dancing (it will exhaust them)

and then you can always threaten to take away desert

Should I take Ballet away?sunshine opera theater

you can ground them. its pretty scary, even if you say, your grounded, then say, your grounded to your room until 3:45, (maybe its 2:45 now) and when i come get you, then you can come out and eat snack. i was afraid of even them saying your grounded,
Unfortunately, you already threatened it, so you have to take it away. I'd start by taking away a lesson here or there, I wouldn't take it fully away unless they're terrible. After you take it once, the threat will be enough to stop the behavior. From then on, I'd make sure to threaten to take away comfort objects, bedtime books, dessert after dinner, a favorite toy, etc. Or, make them do something nice for the other one.
I think the only option for you is to take away the ballet lessons. If you can take away something they truely enjoy doing - it will have the outcome you are looking for.
If ballet is something they really want to do then that is what i would use for leverage. If they really want to take ballet it may help them behave and look forward to starting it in January. You can keep a calendar where they can see it and mark their behavior on a daily basis so they can see how they are doing.
It wasn't the best idea but you already threatened it, so you have to go through with it. If you back out now, they'll contunie this sassy talk. See how they act and wait. They deserve this. Growing up my mom would always be lose about my punishments, while my dad was strict about them, so I learned a lot. Now I have two little girls (2 mon. and 19 mon.) and am raising my 13 year old niece and have learned to stick to punishments. Maybe if they are better put them back in, but if they are back pull them back out. It'll teach them a lesson. My dad started taking pianno lessons away from me (which I adored) when I was 4. I always got my act back together. Good luck!

~Taylor
I know you threatened taking away the ballet lessons, so I think you should take them away - for 1 or 2 lessons or so and then switch to a different system (unless the behavior hasn't improved). I agree with others that since you've already threatened it you have to follow through but you might not have to for the whole 4 months.

What I would do is get a big calendar for each of them, and give them stars (or whatever sticker is on clearance) for every time they behave good, or NOT give them stars when they behave badly. At the end of the month (or week, whichever you choose) you could count up the stars, and whoever has the most, or if they both did really good then give them a reward - a day at the zoo, a new outfit they want, or maybe an allowance (or bonus to an allowance if they already get one). I think the allowance option would be the cheapest and I do think that even the 5 year old is at an age where they can start learning about money. But this way, they are getting rewarded for good behavior, they can see how each day their actions affect their rewards, and good behavior has extra benefits besides Mom yelling at them and being crabby (though that part might be too much for the 5 year old, she might grasp part of it).

A friend of mine went through this with her kids' behavior when one was 8 and the other was 4, it turned out there were problems at a new school for the 8 year old and the 4 year old was copying, so if there have been any big events in their life, they may be acting out from that. In which case I think you'll need to add some kind of kids therapy or talking sessions to talk about whatever is upsetting them.

Good luck!
Taking the lessons away is the best thing to do until they can make up their minds as to what they really want to do.